Hello blog=) really miss rambling on ur white,expressionless face=) The only time Im here is when :

a) I really really have nothing to do

b) My internet connection is so fucking excellent that if I dont make something out if it, I'll feel rugi. Hehehehe

That's why i only have one follower. I dont have the nagging need to post regularly. It has been only what? 2? Wow...im so heartless---coz 'ex abundacia cordis.os loquitor' means "from the abundance of the heart,the mouth speaks".

No one's gonna read this coz my only follower is my dear fren,Shairil Farhana who's being a dear fren,heh heh. So shairil,dont bother reading this. Just wanna pinch in some gibberish here,go and do something worthwhile kay. I dont think you can stand reading even 2 lines of this, my English has become so fucked up. --err--was it ever NOT fucked up? Hahahaha

Btw..how do i insert a pic here?--IT ILLITERATE. Nehh..forget bout a pic. A video instead.

Im currently in a leg-on-leg,sitting position-in front of my laptop,on a Saturday morning,--0115

and alone in my room..trying to figure out what to pen down. erk. type out. nope..flood in. Whatever that looks good when you are reading this. WAIT..who are you????thanks for clicking to the most horrible,boring blog!---now click 'x' on the top right of ur screen,before you move on to read more n pass remarks to ur frens bout my pitiful blog.Now!!! ====Well since you insist,---silekan.

Im not cursing as Im writing. Wait..this is not right. Babi setan. Bosan bodo. Fuckiedickiefuck. I cant believe Im actually indulging in the comfort, I should say, of blogging. Tht means I really,really have nothing to do. Really. That means Hadi, my budak botak n the love of my life is unreachable, that means my friends are all occupied, and that means Im listening to the Titanic soundtrack 'MY HEART WILL GO ON feeling like a loser coz I've got nothing to do"

I am literally listening to Celine Dion's My Heart Will Go On on my laptop right now. Courtesy of 'playlist-sheila---by Hadi' that i downloaded from his laptop.

Hadi. Panjang umo ko. Hadi Hadi Hadi. Tried calling you for several times just now, guess you fell asleep kan baby=) Coz we never missed talking for an hour or more on the phone since the day I came back to India---the most divine country,kan syg? Dgn bau ketiak keling yg aromatherapeutic, dgn system yg so damn fucked up mengalahkan sistem jamban kat indonesia.

So my medication,my prescription,is you la budak botak. This is how it is==>

Rx

Tab Hadi Tank 10000mg OD for the rest of patient's life

Repeat medication STAT if necessary, 10 times the normal dose.

Pouring my heart off is something I will never grow tired of my syg=)

Except this time, Im doing it online, which is kinda scary coz it comes with a video of us,--two lovebirds who are so in love,til this very moment=) Im listening to your playlist baby. So tangibly nostalgic.=)

If you ever come across this baby, hope you put on 'You're The Inspiration' by Chicago. It'll be more...reminiscing. Hehehehehe..

Thought wanna write some more...but my eyes..damn u sleepy head...erhh..im gonna join u tido la now..

i dont know why i just cant listen to you

It has never been different when it comes to preparing for exam,for me.
Since the days of UPSR,PMR,SPM,A-LEVEL, and 1ST YEAR UNIVERSITY EXAM, it has always been intense adrenaline attacks and severe mental breakdown days before the exam, simply because i've never actually gotten the word 'consistency' in my head right,what more the phrase "blaja rajin2" or "usaha tangga kejayaan". Instead I live by the infamous self-quotes that seem to have survival scheme which I,the lazy arse think is ample.Like "Ah...chill woman..it's not like you're gonna fail or anything" or "Are you fucking kidding yourself???Wait til the last minute!" or " Hah..im not gonna bother trying to be prepared coz im never gonna be..so keep it till the last moment" or "Im gonna be consistent from now on..hahahaha..just kidding"
And if there's black and white,or angels and demons,or wrong and right,there's always Sheila and her alter ego.
"Sheila....it's time for you to make the big change..get out of that lazy planet" my alter ego feebly chides.

Dear alter ego, here's a shoutout for you. Nope. Shoutouts. :

-I keep things till the very last minute and no matter how important it is, i make sure the work is done.
-Like u've never seen me trying to be Miss Consistent before! I suck at it!
-Remember when I miraclously decided to prepare for an exam 2 weeks earlier n ended up getting the worst outcome i've ever expected in my life?
-You only come to my life after thousands of small last-minute-work successs,which cant really shake me off this pretty exciting habit.
-And you sound just like my long-life nagging dad whom i dont really listen to when it comes to organizing myself.
-So try harder....because y?

--------------------IM FUCKING FUCKED UP COZ THERE'S A MILLION MILES OF UNFAMILIAR WORDS I NEED TO GET IN MY STUPID HEAD BEFORE TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!--------------------------------

Will i ever learned that i cant be myself in this crazy,hectic,bulky,terrible life of a medical student?
I dont know why i just cant listen to you.

ex tempore(off the cuff)

3 days of holiday left me nothing much to do but to employ the very knack or nature i should say,of a koala bear.(fyi,a koala bear is a mammal that sleeps the most in the world,22 hours a day)
hahahahaha..and how about a "medic is hectic,i need a break" whine...i so took the precious 3 days for granted.Plus,to add to the misery three-quarts of my mates coloured the only long holiday we have til August with a trip to Goa. Perghff..who cares..(i freaking care!!!!!) been to Goa twice..(not with so many friends!!!)...n toured the whole place already..(just the Baga Beach,lameass)
Anyhow,i should be thanking my two saviours for not letting me drown in the sea of boredom. Would have prolly rotten to death without them dragging me here and there for some 'fun oxygen'. Go down.

Friday,the first of-day
1.woke up at 4 in the morning for a qiamullail.(wow am surprised with myself too,=)
2.and took an 8am bus to mangalore-God knows how i wanted to doze off so much,but being in a terror ride just kept my gut in episodic adrenaline attacks)
3.owh and noreen slept off,drooled as usual,what a sight,to my right was the bus window with A VIEW TO KILL FOR,(shit shit and shit) and to my left was an angel in life and a real wild boar in her sleep.
4.across the bus aisle(where the conductor bus comes and blurts this----- "pssp pssp.thirty-eight". What???Huhh..Owh..it took me ...8 rounds of Papez circuit to interpret that.) there was hanna,another wild boar, a species from the land of Swaziland where the girls dance nakedly in front of their king on the his birthday. This species doesnt drool that much usually but they look equally bad as the previously described one.
5. reached there and had our senior bought our tickets for fast and furious! now that really worthed the swears that escaped my mouth during the annoying treacherous journey.
6. mocked the intermission system India has in the middle of a picture,and laughed like nobody's business,-Gotta learn something bout disrespect
7. dropped by at Depot,a gift shop,where we had these 2 local stalkers annoying us,WHO SMELLED LIKE HORSE SHIT AND PROUDLY LIFTED THEIR ARMS A FEW TIMES IN AN ACT OF POINTING TO A PARTICULAR ITEM TO ATTRACT NOREEN BUT INSTEAD HAD OUR LUNGS POISONED WITH THEIR DEADLY,FILTHY,NAKMATI ARMPIT ODOUR.Fuck, hit my frontal lobes immediately and had a temporary headache. Fired them harsh words but apparently English is just a "Hi what's ur name" thing to them. Aku tak tahan sangat bau tengit ,gave a middle finger to drive them away.
8. Went back finally after touring the mall, yupp, unfortunately was in a rollercoaster ride again, we were practically thrown off in every direction, it was fun anyhow. The funny thing is, albeit the high possibility of the bus getting into an accident, we managed to sleep while being in this jerky yet harmonic motions: to the left,right,front and back.
9. had a band practice a.k.a. karaoke session,=)

Saturday,2nd day
1.slept
2.continue sleeping
3.answered a call and slept again
4.jenga-ed at noreen's n hanna's house
5.made 'kek batek' yg tak sedap
6.had an edgy moment of Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Sunday,3rd day
1.yeay....it's sunday and i realised that im a student,a medical student.
2.albeit the worrying conscience i surfed the net instead
3.still worried and went to bed for a therapy
4.woke up and had an acute heart attack,okay,that's it,i really wanna go back to sleep,but this whole koala bear thingie will continue till the time i get ready for pharmac class tomorrow.
5.took a giant leap for a koala bear,WENT TO THE LIBRARY WITH MY JCE UNDERWOOD.
Fuyyo...the orchestra of cheers and applause reverberated in my head as i made the most adventurous walk of the entire holiday-------the 'visit' to the library.
6.came back and blogged my heart out.Ex abundancia cordis,os loquitor-from the abundance of the heart,the mouth speaks.